Wednesday, December 09, 2009

Nazi Seagulls From Hell Defeat Falcon Squadron

I had high hopes last March for a new scheme to rid Scotland of the scourge of the Nazi Seagulls From Hell.

The good councillors of Dumfries had called in the falcons in a bid to drive the seagulls from the town. The theory was that the falcons would think it was Christmas and the seagulls would, well, take flight.

Unfortunately the Nazi Seagulls From Hell were more than a match for the poor falcons, and gull numbers actually increased by 18.5% from last year.

It seems that the town is going to have to revert to other measures - egg removal, machine gun nests, barrage balloons, that kind of thing.

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